Hmm...what was that you said?

Just a soapbox where I can dream, ventilate, share, learn, laugh and pretend, play and so and so. I had a conversation with myself and convinced myself to start a blog, and here it is. Bombs away!

Who's who in my zoo

My photo
I: "I will start a blog." Me: "Why?" I: "Oh, I don't really know. Because I can?" Me: "What will I blog about?" I: "The usual." Me: The usual? Like what?" I: "Well, things on my mind, things I keep myself busy with." Me: "Yeah! Like what - be more specific, Self." I: "OK let's see. Hobbies, food, music, trends, friends, money, bucket lists, shopping lists, politics, restaurants, travels, customer service stories, men, dates from hell, good dates, work, thoughts, jokes, friends, dejavu's, nougat, booze, random coincidences, heart aches, things that irritate me, hopes and dreams, my green monster, sport, Billy, philosophies, my silly theories, Facebook, brain farts, sleep patterns, favourites, house renovations, dance offs, bargains, things-I-can-do-with-my-gluegun, habits, parties, things I really, really want but cannot afford right now, organic food and farming, vices, fashion. How's that? Are you still awake?" Me: "That sounds cool, but who would care to listen to you?" I: "No one I guess, but that's OK. This will be for me, I don't mind who sees it." Me: "Cool, I'm in!"

24 February 2010

People in your life for reasons and seasons and whatever

I really didn't want to ever write about this on here, but I'm in the moment now, so I'm just going to do it. Plus writing this down is somehow a commitment to actually do something about this once and for all.
Someone that was once close to me shattered the last bit of hope I had today, of any form of reconcilliation in the future.
I cannot go into details, not because this is the wrong forum to do so (who cares, it's MY forum), but because the details hurt too much.
I am, however, determined to use this as the final push in the right direction that I've been needing - maybe even subconciously looking for? - for some time now, to just move on.
Sad thing is, moving on will mean erasing Person from my life, past, present and future, and that will be hard. Ever seen Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? That comes to mind here. If only I could, trust me, I think I would do it, because that trauma is probably much better to go through than the effects the current "situation" has on me.
So, so long my friend, I pray that you're happy, succesfull and healthy, really I do. I wish it didn't have to come down to this, but in all fairness, you closed that last door in my face, and I'm stronger than I used to be, so I need to do what I need to do to become my old self again. You meant the world to me once upon a time my friend. Take care.

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